Washington Pink Socks, the true American dynasty.

The following is the conclusion of much in-depth research into the history of American sport and the socio-economic impact of one the most influential  organizations in America.  The conclusions drawn are based on 100% inconclusive research from the institute of made-up-ology.

For those whom don’t know the Washington Pink Socks have a long and important history that tells us much about the very essence of humanity.  Originally developed by two renegades from the little know rounder’s teams the Boston Red Sox and the Boston White Sox the Pink Socks have grown into a global brand.  The principle architects of the original team are the forever remembered Mr. Cheese Eating and a Mr. Burger Monkey.  It is they that are forever remembered song ‘Crap I put your red sock in my white wash’, a tune that pays homage to the jovial event that finally broke the walls of their bitter rivalry and thus allowed a working relationship that would bring them 10 successive world titles and an adopted son.

The Pink Socks since there creation in 1900 have always been at the very top of their sport. Sadly, they have underachieved in recent years owing to the fact that American Sports Association only allows teams within the 50 states to play for the World Series of Football.  This was introduced under the initiative called ‘Can’t vote, can’t win’, a small piece of legislation brought in to ensure that the USA were always the best in the world as a result keeping out other nations.  Regrettably for the much loved Pink Socks they failed to make allowances for the DC region and have thus insured their exclusion from all post and regular season games.  This has meant that for the last 98 years they have been forced to play the Harlem Globe Trotters in an eternal game of Baseketball – a game that was recently ripped of by Hollywood types who tried to cover their tracks by making out that the game was a hybrid of Basketball and rounder’s, when in actual fact it is Basketball and Football.

The idea for turning a rounders team in a football team was developed after a long discussion concerning what to do in the off season (amazingly this was the reason form baseball being introduced to the UK, and is the reason why the Derby County ground is called the baseball field ).  It was believed that by allowing the rounder’s players to run and perform actual athletics that perhaps it would encourage the youth of the nation to not grow and big a big fat slobs like their hero’s.  Sadly this initiative has fallen flat on its cake eating face largely because the rounder’s off season lasts for a total of 22.5 hours and that simply isn’t long enough for kids to be re-programmed.

The Washington Pink Socks continue to be an inspiration to people across the globe.  They stand for our inalienable right to change and better ourselves, to push beyond the boundaries of our fore fathers and come together to watch grown men kick a ball.  For in those 90 minutes we can gaze beyond horizon and see our true essence.  We can finally realize that in life, as in real sports that there are not always winners and losers, but sometime there are draws.  There are times, more times than not, when we see that life is OK.  It’s not the best and it’s not the worst, there is room for improvement, but it hasn’t been a disaster.  We learn to take solace in knowing that we are there to fight another day and we have not had to bow to the extremists whom see the world in only black and white… Thank you Pink Socks you truly are an inspiration.


Posted on February 5, 2010, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. What was this about again? your friends were making fun of you for not having proper football in the US? so you had to resort to baseball? silly boys 🙂

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